Tag: mental illness

Deafening Defeat…

My anger quelled today. I realized a number of things that were flawed in my thought process about my aunt dying at the hands of the pandemic. The magic that I believed in was tested and I feel like I partially failed at that test. Here’s what I learned. Anger is Part of the Normal

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Choosing Wonder

Choosing Wonder IS the easiest choice. Wonder expresses how much you value the feelings of anxiety and how badly you want to heal those feelings. Amber Rae offers some amazing advice in her authentic book, “Choose Wonder over Worry.”

The Fragile State of Frustration

In life, I have made these choices that I knew would probably end up bad at the time I made them, but I forged forward ignoring the clear signs. Maybe my hope in humanity is much greater than it should be, but I can’t stop believing that people are more good than bad. I was

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Compassion Is Necessary

The word I want to highlight in this post is compassion. If someone shows kindness, caring, and a willingness to help others, they’re showing compassion. This is a word for a very positive emotion that has to do with being thoughtful and decent. Giving to a charity takes compassion. Volunteering to work with sick people or animals

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It Takes me Under Fast…

Some part of me is losing control. The balance is off so badly that I don’t know what to feel. I feel insecurity. I feel distant. I feel messy. I feel chaotic. Why? This is so out of left field, it’s so frustrating! I know bipolar is not curable. I know I have to learn

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I’m Thankful for…

Today is a holiday I used to believe to be a waste of time. I used to say selfish things like: What do I have to be thankful for living with bipolar disorder? Or Should I be thankful I didn’t commit suicide this year? It used to be an unhealthy day for me, one where

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Powerful Truth This Morning: Comparisons & Self Judgements

I wrote a blog feeling hopeless the other day. I had just gotten home, my energy was low from the long travels and I felt overwhelmed because I was putting expectations on myself. This was a huge MISTAKE! I went to Bali to find myself, and find myself was exactly what I did. Sometimes I

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My Real Life …. Huge Joke

I’m home. I missed being home because of the familiar faces and my children. But I am miserable. I don’t know why, I can’t explain it, I wish I could understand how I am capable of being my truest self in Bali, then coming home and forgetting who I am. I was so Happy and

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Have Faith in the Bigger Plan

Sometimes I find myself getting so caught up in the details. At home, I work myself up when things don’t go at least somewhat as they should or how I envisioned in my mind. This is because I set an expectation. The root of all negative things for me stems from freaking expectations! Today, I

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F*ck … The War is Coming

Inner child therapy is fucking hard. It hurts a lot. It makes me see the pain much deeper than I thought was possible. I just realized today that my 15 year old self is a narcissistic, brat, who got traumatized so much she doesn’t know the difference between pleasure and pain. She has been in

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