Tag: lost

I’m Thankful for…

Today is a holiday I used to believe to be a waste of time. I used to say selfish things like: What do I have to be thankful for living with bipolar disorder? Or Should I be thankful I didn’t commit suicide this year? It used to be an unhealthy day for me, one where

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How Did I Get Lost?

This meditation today scared me. I usually always remember what happens when I meditate but today, I lost track of it. I feel like I have left my body and saw something I wasn’t meant to see and now I am not allowed to recall it. It’s puzzling me. I went super deep, I remember

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F*ck … The War is Coming

Inner child therapy is fucking hard. It hurts a lot. It makes me see the pain much deeper than I thought was possible. I just realized today that my 15 year old self is a narcissistic, brat, who got traumatized so much she doesn’t know the difference between pleasure and pain. She has been in

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The “Why” Left Me Awake at Night

The only words that are going through my head is “why?” Three letters and a world of uncertainty behind what they might mean for me, what the answer might be. Will I be ready to hear the answer? … I am sure you are wondering why I am asking why?  Or maybe you think I

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I Guess It’s Time… Letting Go.

Maybe it’s just me, but letting go has never been easy for me. In fact I feel abandoned, rejected and deep emotional pain when someone says to me, “you have to let go.” I feel like the option is worse than the thought of dying, but perhaps that why it is necessary. Some of my

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